a short description of this entry

should I read, watch tv, do yoga, meditate, climb to the roof and breath the city exhaust and clouds mixing together, work, sweat, dream all the things I fail at, work work and dream about working. On an evening such as this, it's hard to tell if I exist. I am so disappointed when I feel the life drain out of me.

And I am wondering, like always, when that alive feeling is going to catch up with me. Perhaps I will sleep up on the roof tonight. Do you think wierd crazies infiltrate the roofs of minnesotian cities or only archatypal aliens?

Tonight, I wish I were on my mountain bike, totally alone, plowing through pen park proving my own strength, sweating, with a little nirvana whispering in my ear. And fresh air.

But I have my room, HBO & other distractions, a view of the buildings almost erie, and a fake tree accenting the cold white leather furniture. What I wouldn't give to nap on the white trainer goodwill couch, were I am sure mice were living, and above the cieling is scorched from John burning up all the spider webs, and wade next door, and the bike train to the west and the bay to east. Am I feeling the woods call yet? Ha.

I will definately be planning that trip to the SW this winter break. Ah. It's been way too long since I have been on an adventure.