redeemed, dreamed, and schemed away...

It's been such a long, long while, I have not been intentionally neglecting d-land, just had enough to do not to think about it.

The new tour gig is fabulous. I love it. I am on my own to work on paperwork most of the week, with the occasional actor meeting, TD phone call or National Building plan announcement. It's, well, gee gosh, just swell. I like it a lot. The people I work with have a clue what they are doing and I don't have to rush about trying to find the answer to what should be common knowledge to any employee. I hope I am doing a good job. But who cares, really, is there anyone else to do it?

Socially, my bed and I have bonded greatly in the past 4 days. Oh, my new lovely bed in guest housing. The apt is big and comfy. But no maids to clean up my messes. I have been so sickly and exhausted lately that I have been falling asleeep at insane hours like 8:30 and 10:30 and dear god, 11pm. And so tired. Who knows, could be the day of missed drugs, the week of partying in IA or winter. I am not going to question it. Just coffee it. More more more. Why I ever gave up caffinee is beyond me. I now have to dig my fucking feet in the dirt and give up the all-too-illusive cigarettes. Mmmm. I like being the bad, bad girl I can never be.

And speaking of bad. I did sleep w/B again. Ok, sleep, not so much the right word... Um, we did some oral and then passed out in our respective roooms. No emotions really involved, we liked the sex part, because we have that connection, but other than that, nothing. He drives me crazy. He came to see a show with me on Tue and I wanted him, but I didn't want to be around him. Lust is a strange cowboy.

But I'm making plans (it's that time of the month) to be better to myself. Sleep right, get some crazy exercise, eat better (I have to cook for about 2 weeks, stay tuned) and generally just feel better.

I am taking tomorrow off. First day since Um, January. And I'm sure it will be my last until we get this tour on the road and buzzin. I am pumped though, really proud and LOVE to be working again. Can you tell my brain has been active (instead of my big bright green pleasure machine?)