happiness is

happiness is...

(don't look here for the profound)

but I've found that change is something which keeps me alive and happy. Huge life and job changes which involve moving and leaving. When I thought I would be in this job forever and live in this city forever I was very sad. The details were worked out very well in my head, but I cannot live my life how I have figured it out. It will never be that way.

I got the job. I am going to company manage a midwest tour for ctc. Very excited. And I will have enough money saved to relocate and not be in debt.

I know I just have to follow the path that my life goes and be happy with any direction (as long as it is in theatre). My problem lies when I set the path out in front, light it well, groom and dance my way around every thought of it. And the reality is rather flat and day-to-day. But if I continue to be thrown off my neatly-made path then will I ever get used to it and give up the dreaming and scheming? I don't know if I could. I gave up singing long ago, and that is not who I want to be, I know that now, but it was very difficult then. Perhaps it is the same with directing. I will only know when I pass another loop in the road.

Truckin...

I have a mild mood today, the anxiety of the morning almost killed me. But I am happy I have the job and that my life will be changing in a few short months. Yippy!!!